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Thursday, March 15, 2012

Don't Look Back

I know everyone's circumstances are different in life, but ultimately as humans we all go through some of the same things, at one point in life or another.  We all experience love, loss, pain, betrayal, happiness and sadness. 

Sometimes in life we make hard decisions that change our lives forever.  When it first happens, people often play the "why", "what" or "how" game.  Why me?  Why did they do that to me? What did I do wrong?  What can I do to make it better? What am I going to do now?  How could I let this happen? 

Growing up, I always prided myself on being the best student I could be and the daughter that didn't do much wrong.  I am not saying I never did anything wrong by all means, I just hardly ever got caught at it.  I guess you could say that is a plus to airing on the side of caution.  It always seemed that no matter how good I was in school or how great of a daughter I was, bad things always found their way into my life.

I have had many different life-changing events take place.  I have had to let some people in my life go for what they did to me at the time and just walk away.  It took me a long time to learn not to play guessing games on why certain things happened to me.  I realized God was not punishing me for any particular reason and that we all go thru things, just in different ways.

As the years pass, you can reflect back on some things and realize you made the best decision you could have during that time.  Sometimes you just have to walk away from certain circumstances, people or things in order to gain a better perspective about yourself.   Some things you will always wish you could go back and do it all over again...better.

Some 10 years ago I had to make one of the hardest decisions ever and chose not to look back.  I took every step I thought I could to rid the memories and pain.  Over the years, as I began to find myself and I realized that I am worth taking care of.  I came to the realization that I was holding on to so much hurt and anger because of this person, that I had to let go.  I reached out, said that I forgive but will not forget & that life is too short for the BS. 

I told a friend some time ago that no matter what, this hurt and anger that had chains around me would no longer take up my head or my heart. 

Well today was proof positive that I have evolved into a better person than what I was 10 years ago.  I ran into this person this morning and I was not angry.  Actually, I couldn't help myself but laugh at the situation that I accidentally walked into.

My point of all of this is that you will never move towards a bright future if you keep looking back into the darkness of despair.  I know all to well it is not always easy, but:  Live, Love, Laugh & LET GO!

1 comment:

  1. Sometimes I wonder if my problem is I just can't seem to let go. I want to be where you are. I was there once. When I made the choice to go through WW and drop the weight and be a runner. I let all that pain and anger go. Over the years new pain and anger have developed and now there is a total relapse. Perhaps its possible I fight with M so much because I can't let go of the past. Maybe I look for reasons to be so angry about. That is something I need to look into more and work on.

    I have seen you come SO far just in the few years that I have known you. You just keep continuing to look forward, there is a whole life ahead waiting for you.